Varifrank: Kerry Alert: Hes giving Speeches again

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Kerry Alert: Hes giving Speeches again

Like Abraham Van Helsing to Dracula, I feel it is my mission to save civilization from the menace that is John Kerry.

So, Im sharpening my wooden stakes and stopping by to get a little holy water, because my nemesis is once again, speech-ifying to the masses.

Here is his recent speech at Georgetown.

oh, gott im himmel, what have we done to deserve this curse?

Ok, I dont have time right this minute for a full on fisk of this pile of dreck. So heres just one small observation.

Kerry describes the sound of the inside of C-130 as "silent except for the "din" of the engines.

Din? Is he kidding me?

Allow me to describe what the inside of C-130 sounds, feels and smells like.

Take a 55 gallon metal drum. Fill it 25% of the way to the top with one inch industrial ball bearings. Take a set of old gym socks, leave them unwashed for a minimum of one month, then coat them in black coffee and creosote tree sealer. After the socks have been treated with the "Military Aircraft Simulator Scent**" climb inside the drum, then seal the lid. Have one of your friends then take you to the top of Lombard street in San Francsico (thats right, the "crookedest street in the world"). Line the street itself with wind chimes and gongs in such a way that the gongs and windchimes will strike the drum as it travels down the hill.

Have your friend locate every gang in the bay area, it shoudnt be hard, there are alot of them and they have scads of free time. Supply each gang member with a baseball bat then have the gang members stand along both sides of Lombard street.

At this point your friend should push the drum, with you, the ball bearings and the coffee, sweat and creosote soaked socks down the hill.

When you reach the bottom, you can then say that you have experienced the same effect as flying in a C-130.

The C-130 is a magnificent aircraft. It is also freaking loud inside the cargo area and not a whole lot better on the flight deck. It is so loud that you can shout as loud as you want at the person sitting next to you and they cant hear you. You have to wear ear protection just to be a passenger, and frankly it doesnt really help.

The last time I rode in a C-130 ( circa 1977 - 14 hours from Castle AFB to Mcchord AFB and return ) I had a ringing in my ears that lasted for two weeks. I would not use the word "din" to describe any part of the C-130 experience,but hey, thats just me...

**- My experience is that all military aircraft interiors smell like a combination of coffee, sweat and creosote, no matter how new they are. It is a unique sensory experience that once you come across it will always send you back to the first time you sat in the ready room of some AFB on a rainy Saturday morning in a poorly lit tarpaper, green industrial laminate and naugahyde covered room hoping to catch a flight from nowhere to somewhere else.

Posted @ October 26, 2005 11:24 AM | Current Affairs

You forgot to mention the oh so comfortable troop seats and the refreshing cold breeze that circulates free of charge. One ride on a 130 from Aviano to the UK and that was all it took. From then on, I either took a few days of leave and drove or tried to hookup with a C-9 medivac instead. Much nicer.

Posted by: sammy small at October 26, 2005 01:00 PM

Frank,

The definition of "din" means - A jumble of loud, usually discordant sounds OR to stun with deafening noise.

So to be honest, you shouldn't have an issue with the word "din", but rather the double-speak we now expect from the (oxy) moronic Mr. Kerry. "Silent din" indeed.

Posted by: Ray-Ray at October 26, 2005 05:24 PM

Ray - using "din" to refer to the sound produced inside the cargo area of a C-130 is like describing "chan darette" as a place that serves food.

technically accurate, but lacking in the key details.

Din? Cacaphonous?, maybe. eardrum splitting? maybe, but "din" is the sound I would use to describe dodger stadium before the game starts. if you can talk over it, its not a "din".

The hercules is loud enough on the inside to stun a small animal into a coma.

Posted by: varifrank at October 26, 2005 06:15 PM

Pretty good description there. My first ride was on an 'A' model from Kadena to Danang back in 65. No such thing as ear plugs back then, especially for jarheads. I remember thinking that nothing that noisy could stay in the air for very long. Thus started the long road to my current hearing loss.

Looking forward to your fisk of the weasel. That was a good start.

Posted by: Luther McLeod at October 27, 2005 06:52 PM